


Drunk.

by DwarvishWarriors



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Drunk Thorin, Drunkenness, Happy Ending, Light Angst, M/M, Stubborn Thorin, and I mean properly drunk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-02
Updated: 2014-03-02
Packaged: 2018-01-14 08:36:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1259923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DwarvishWarriors/pseuds/DwarvishWarriors
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I’m no’ drunk!” Thorin protested drunkenly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Drunk.

Thorin pressed the bottle to his lips and took a languish sip, less than two days ago he was crazed with gold sickness, less than two days ago fighting in a blood frenzied war in which he, his nephews and his company had barely made it out with their lives, less than two days ago he was signing a treaty with the men of Laketown and the elves of Mirkwood and had given the gold they desperately wanted, but in shorter time than that less than two hours ago he had discovered that the burglar hobbit, who had stayed by his side in sickness and in glory, was leaving and going back to his shires home in less than a day. And that was the news that hurt the king the most.

 Thorin had left the lunch table where he and the company were eating their rations and had broken into his grandfathers old ale cellars and had grabbed as many bottles as he could of the old liquor before finding his old brooding spot, which was the top of the large figures that stood guard at the gates of Erebor. But there was a problem, Thorin had never been much of a drinker and when he did he lost all common sense and majesty, well according to Dis he did. Thorin filled himself with more liquid courage before throwing the bottle over the side of the stone figure before a sudden memory surged and he began to sing-

 _“So the cat on his fiddle played hey-diddle-diddle,_ _a_ _jig that would wake the dead:_

_He squeaked and sawed and quickened the tune,_

_While the landlord shook the Man in the Moon:_

_'It's after three!' he-_ _”_

“Thorin!” A voice called and the king crawled with little nobility to the edge of the rock and looked over to see Balin standing in a pile of broken glass which Thorin’s drunken mind assumed was the shattered remains of his drink bottles, the king didn’t care though all he felt was a warm belly and a fuzzy feeling in his head. He waved down at the grey haired dwarf and grinned.

“Hello Balin!” Thorin called before he furrowed his brow. “How did ya’ get down there?”

“More importantly, how did you get up there!?” Balin called and Thorin looked himself before shrugging.

“I don’ know.” Thorin called back and he could practically hear Balin’s sigh of annoyance.

“Well, could you come down, please.” Balin replied and Thorin huffed before grabbing his full bottles of ale and cuddling them to his chest as he began stumbling down the steps of the large stone figure.

“I’ll see you later, Biron.” Thorin said with a well meaning pat on the stone figures arm as he reached Balin.

“Thorin, have you been drinking?” Balin asked with an impatient huff and Thorin snorted.

“No obviously no’ Balin.” Thorin replied as he swayed slightly on the spot. “Why ask such an idiot elf question?”

Balin huffed and closed his eyes, counting to himself much like he did when Thorin was a dwarfling and ordered him to find him more chocolate. Now Thorin thought about it that was most likely the only reason why Balin controlled himself from smacking Thorin up the side of the head.

“If you’re not drunk touch your ears and your nose.” Balin said quickly before adding. “At the same time.”

Thorin huffed and rolled his eyes before moving his hands towards his ears and nose, the bottles that he had forgotten were in his arms falling to the floor with an echoing crash, Thorin jumped slightly before looking down at the drink.

“Now look what you made me do.” Thorin whined as he gestured to the ale now slipping between the cracks on the stone floor and Balin huffed again.

“I think we need to get you to your chambers.” Balin said before he reached for Thorin’s bicep but the petulant king flinched away and Balin huffed once again obviously a few drunken mishaps away from pushing his royal pain in the arse from the tallest wall in Erebor.

“No.” Thorin said with his arms folded over his chest, pouting drunkenly at the elder dwarf.

 “Thorin you need to-”

“No.”

“Thorin-”

“No.”

“Thori-”

“No.”

“Thorin Durin, if you do not get to your room this instance I will-”

“No!” Thorin said finally before picking up the remaining bottle of ale and running away, slipping on some spilled ale as he left. Balin sighed before turning towards the falling sun and rising his monocle in the air.

\----

“That’s the signal.” Dwalin said as he saw his brother’s monocle flickering in the sun from miles away where he and the princes were sat on the edge of a hill, taking a quick break from their sparring. “He’s pissed out of his mind.”

“What do we do then?” Kili asked and Dwalin shrugged.

“There’s not much we can do.” Dwalin replied. “Yer uncles a slippery bastard when he’s drunk.”

“Why did he get drunk in the first place?” Kili asked now and Dwalin snorted like it was obvious and Fili placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Isn’t it obvious lad?” Dwalin asked and Kili shook his head.

“Kee, you remember Master Baggins told us he was leaving tonight?” Fili asked and Kili nodded before the eldest prince continued. “Well, uncle has a let’s say... _difficult_ relationship with him.”

“Oh enough of this rubbish.” Dwalin grumbled before slapping a hand on Kili’s shoulder. “Yer uncle wants to bugger the hobbit but has the social skills of a rock.”

“Then why did he get drunk?” Kili asked and Dwalin grumbled.

“Sometimes when yer uncle gets frustrated he needs a little something to take the edge off instead of facing his problems head on like a proper dwarf.” Dwalin explained and Kili’s eyes widened slightly in understanding. “And he is doing just that, getting himself nice and steamed instead of telling the hobbit how he feels.”

“We need to help him then!” Kili said now as he jumped to his feet and Fili sighed.

“Kee it’s too late now, Master Baggins has already began packing and has asked not to be disturbed.” Fili replied and Kili pouted sadly before taking a seat back down next to Dwalin.

“Don’t worry lad, it’ll all work out.” Dwalin said before he patted the youngest prince on the back.

\----

Thorin’s crown tilted slightly on his head as he danced about the throne room, having broken back into the wine cellars he had found large quantities of alcohol and had consumed most of it. Thorin usually wasn’t one to drink but anything was better than feeling the pain he felt before in his chest.

 _Stupid hobbit with his stupid golden curls and his stupidly pretty face and his stupid stupidness just makes me feel so stupid._ Thorin said eloquently to himself as he snuggled a wine bottle closer to himself and curled up on the throne.

“My lord Thorin!” A voice called and Thorin pushed his crown out the way of his eyes to look at the dwarf, who turned out not to be a dwarf at all but instead a tall grey wizard.

“Gandal’ what you doin’ here?” Thorin called with a drunken grin.

“Well, Bilbo is going back to the shire tonight and I am here to accompany him.” Gandalf replied, unsure if the king was in a stable enough manner to hear all of this. The answer turned out to be no when the king glared at him, his eyes looking dull due to the alcohol in his blood stream.

“Stupid hobbit.” Thorin grumbled. “What does the shire have that I don’t have?!”

Gandalf stared at Thorin for a few moments before the king shook his head quickly.

“I mean Erebor! What does the shire have that Erebor doesn’t have?!” Thorin shouted now, his crown falling from his raven locks as he did.

“The shire is Bilbo’s home-”

“So is Erebor! I said he could stay didn’t I!?” Thorin argued and Gandalf huffed, reminding the king of Balin a few hours ago.

“Well yes, but if I remember correctly you wanted to come home when you were forced from it.” Gandalf said condescendingly and Thorin huffed.

“I s’pose.” Thorin grumbled as he took another long sip from the wine bottle.

“And, I am sure that Bilbo will visit once he has been settled down again.” Gandalf added and Thorin huffed before waving a hand in dismissal at the wizard. Once he was sure the grey wizard was gone the king snuggled down into his throne and took a long sip of the amber liquid in the bottle that was clutched in his hands before discovering it was empty and throwing it across the room. The sad king began to sing again of a song he had heard in his halls and hadn’t appreciated until now.

_“Bilbo, Bilbo, Bilbo Baggins,_

_He's only three feet tall._

_Bilbo, Bilbo, Bilbo Baggins,_

_The bravest little hobbit of them all.”_

\----

Bilbo hummed to himself as he lovingly folded the Mithril shirt Thorin had gifted him before the battle of five armies and he had kept as a repayment, Bilbo tucked some other clothes he had received from the men of Laketown and the elves of Mirkwood, some satchels of gold and some food for the long trip ahead of him all found a spot in his small bag until there was a sudden knock at the door.

“Come in!” Bilbo called and looked towards the door opened and in walked the grey wizard.

“How are you Bilbo my boy?” Gandalf asked with his usual friendly smile and Bilbo nodded once to him.

“I am perfectly alright,” Bilbo replied as he folded his torn waistcoat that he just couldn’t part with into the bag that was placed on his bed. “Can I help you with anything?”

“No, I was just coming by to see if you were ready.” Gandalf said and Bilbo placed his hands on his hips and looked around the room, checking if he had dropped anything before noticing some tools on the floor that the dwarves had left for him to take.

“Almost.” Bilbo replied as he gathered the tools before deciding to ask the wizard something he had been thinking about all day. “Gandalf, have you seen Thorin today?”

“ _Um,_ yes I have.” Gandalf replied uneasily but the small hobbit smiled slightly.

“Is he well, he was acting terribly strange at lunch today.” Bilbo stated before adding with a shocked tone. “He didn’t even stay around for his dessert, which is always his favourite course!”

“Well, he was probably very busy with you know, being a king and all.” Gandalf answered quickly before noticing the small smile on Bilbo’s lips as he packed. “He’s very fond of you.”

Bilbo didn’t reply simply shrugged but was unable to rid the smile on his face as he tied his bag shut with the leather straps it the side of the fabric.

“Ready?” Gandalf asked and Bilbo nodded before he shouldered his bag and began walking out of the chamber room, the grey wizard quick to follow.

\----

“I’ll miss you both.” Bilbo said sadly as he pulled both princes in for a hug, both of them snivelling into his small shoulders as he did and hugging him tightly. “Promise you won’t forget me?”

“We promise.” The princes said in unison but it came out muffled in the hobbits shoulders before they both pulled back and wiped their sodden eyes with the back of their hands, Bilbo smiled at them before handing them a handkerchief he had got in Laketown.

Bilbo looked over the faces of his comrades then, all of the dwarves watching him with solemn expressions but others with tears in their eyes as they watched the hobbit, but Bilbo noticed a pair of sharp blue eyes missing from the collective of dwarves and he frowned slightly.

“Where’s Thorin?” Bilbo asked sadly, slightly disappointed that the king couldn’t even take a moment from his schedule to bid him farewell.

“He-well- _um_ \- he’s just very busy.” Balin replied uneasily and Bilbo shook his head before he nodded once to the dwarves and began walking towards the pony that was settled next to Gandalf’s own horse.

“Wait!” A loud voice shouted causing all the dwarves, hobbit and wizard to turn and see the king stumbling down the front steps of Erebor and falling before the hobbit on his knees.

“Bilbo, plea- please don’t leave!” Thorin wailed before throwing his arms around Bilbo’s legs, the company stood staring at the sight in front of them, only Dwalin turning away but even that was in an attempt to hide his laughter.

“Thorin! What are you doing?” Bilbo asked as he placed his hands on Thorin’s shoulders to stop himself from falling over as he was jostled by the sudden weight at his ankles.

“Grovelling! Isn’t that what i’s called when one begs another!? They grovel? Well Master Baggins I am grovelling!” Thorin sobbed into Bilbo’s kneecaps before the hobbit noticed Balin quickly hushing the other dwarves into silence, himself included.

“Yes, I realise you are grovelling but why?” Bilbo asked now as he brushed some of Thorin’s hair out of his face, to see that the dwarf had long tear stains down his cheeks and his eyes were red rimmed.

“Cause I want you to stay, stay in Erebor, stay with me!” Thorin pouted and Bilbo realised now that the large dwarf was as drunk as a Brandybuck on midsummer’s eve.

“Thorin, you’re drunk and-” Bilbo started but Thorin groaned.

“I’m no’ drunk!” Thorin protested drunkenly. “You’re jus’ so lovely and beautiful and brilliant and hobbit-y and just perfectly plump.”

Bilbo blushed slightly at the compliments but knew it was only the drink talking so he tried pushing the king away from his calves.

“No, no, no, no, no!” Thorin shouted quickly as Bilbo began to walk away, emphasising every step the hobbit took by shouting no at him as he practically dragged the king with him as the large dwarf insisted on not letting go.

“Thorin.” Bilbo said now as calmly as he could before Thorin clambered back up his legs slightly. “Will you please let go, you are not thinking straight.”

“No! I’m thinking per- perfa- perfectly clear.” Thorin shouted in protest before he felt hands grab at his fur cloak and began yanking him away from his hobbit, he wriggled out of their grips, causing the hobbit to stumble again.

Thorin was pulled to his feet by the other dwarves and the king watched as the hobbit jump onto the nearby pony, Thorin pulled against the dwarves and called for the hobbit again but Bilbo simply looked back at him with sad eyes before focusing on directing his pony in the right direction.

“Bilbo!” Thorin called desperately one more time but the hobbit didn’t look back and Thorin sobbed slightly before pushing past the dwarves and running back into his home, into Erebor and into the depths of the mountain.

\----

“W-why doesn’t he love me!?” Thorin cried into a mug of ale as Fili and Kili helped him into bed, stripping him of his overcoats as they went and attempted to pull the covers over him even though he was still sat up and complaining.

“I- I gave that hobbit everything, food, shelter, an abundance of love and wha- what did that little bastard give me!? Nothing!” Thorin shouted and Fili rolled his eyes before leaving the room, Thorin swayed as he watched him before turning to Kili who was still trying to untie Thorin’s boots.

“What’s the matter with ‘im?” Thorin asked with a jostled head in the direction Fili just walked out of and Kili shrugged.

“I don’t know uncle, he’s just not used to seeing you like... this.” Kili said awkwardly as he sat on the end of Thorin’s bed.

“What do ya’ mean like this?” Thorin asked with a frown and Kili shrugged again.

“Uncle, why didn’t you tell Bilbo you loved him when you had the chance?” Kili asked suddenly and Thorin winced slightly before he shrugged himself.

“I dunno Kili, I guess I was too afraid.”

“Afraid of what?”

Thorin paused for a moment before sighing and for the first time for the whole day placed his still full mug of ale to the side, not wanting to drink anymore.

“Rejection, Kili.” Thorin replied. “I knew Bilbo was my one since the moment on top of the Carrock... but I couldn’t tell him, I jus’ couldn’t.”

Kili watched his uncle for a moment before he returned to helping him remove his boots as the king continued to speak.

“He was so beautiful Kee, did you see him? After fighting off Azog, he was so beautiful.” Thorin grumbled and Kili simply nodded in reply.

“I love him so much and he’s gone, my one is gone.” Thorin practically sobbed now and Kili rubbed his shoulder.

“And If he returned to you... would you tell him all this?” Kili asked and Thorin thought for a moment before nodding quickly.

“I would.” Thorin sighed. “But it’s too late now.”

Kili smiled sadly before standing up from Thorin’s bed and patting his shoulder again.

“I suppose it is.” Kili said sadly before heading towards the door. “Goodnight Uncle.”

“Goodnight Kee.” Thorin mumbled before he slipped into his pillows and finally passed out into a dreamless sleep.

\----

Thorin winced when he finally opened his eyes, the sun was too bright and sharp it felt like it was stabbing a thousand tiny needles into his flesh and his head was woozy from all the drinks he had consumed within the day before. The king suddenly felt a cool hand brushing against his forehead and he moaned slightly at the healing feel of it before he painfully opened his eyes to see the blurry figure of the hobbit leaning over him.

“Bilbo?” Thorin mumbled happily as his throat was sore from the alcohol that still seemed to burn there. “Can you close the curtains?”

The hobbit laughed slightly then and it felt soothing on Thorin’s ears which made everything sound like sharpening iron.

Shade suddenly consumed the room around him and Thorin was able to finally open his eyes fully to see the hobbit appearing before him in his own glowing light.

“Bilbo.” Thorin said now as he jumped onto his knees on the bed and crawled across it before pulling the hobbit into a hug. “Don’t leave me, don’t leave me ever again.”

“I won’t Thorin, I promise.” Bilbo whispered into Thorin’s pierced ear and Thorin gripped tightly too his hobbit, as if he was afraid to let him go again in fear he would drift away.

“How did you- I mean- how-why-” Thorin asked now as he pulled his face from the hobbits shoulder and looked up at him, the hobbit smiled kindly and tucked a braid behind Thorin’s ear.

“Now I know you are sober.” Bilbo stated as he rubbed his nose against Thorin’s sharply pointed one but the king didn’t reply and instead listened to him continue.

“Kili and Fili came to get me,” Bilbo explained. “I had only just settled down at Beorn’s and they told me how you had gotten worse and about... something you told Kili.”

“About what?” Thorin asked, he remembered many things he had said to Kili last night he was just unsure to what the hobbit was referring to.

“About me being your one...” Bilbo replied and Thorin nodded.

“Because you are Bilbo, you are and you always have been and I love you and we can be together and you will rule by my side and-” Thorin began to babble before Bilbo placed a finger over his lips and traced the line of the kings thin lips.

“Do you ever know when to stop talking?” Bilbo asked with a slight laugh and Thorin shook his head in reply before Bilbo removed his finger from Thorin’s lips and replaced them with his own lips.

Thorin ran his hands up Bilbo’s shoulders and into his mess of curls before pulling him onto the bed, not noticing the princes exchanging thumbs up and nods at the chamber door before slowly closing the door and reminding themselves to find Thorin’s secret alcohol stash and throw it down on lords passing by because Thorin was happy now as he was, not because of what he drank.

**Author's Note:**

> ((This was to help my writers block so sorry...))


End file.
